ANTLERS!

It's time. For the resurrection ya'll! I haven't "blogged" or whatever you want to call it in over 2 years. My last post was before my children were born + here I am with the glory shit that his been steaming for the last long dos anos!

It's almost a week before Christmas so why not get off to some cheer + talk about antlers. Yes! Antlers. On cars. Because that makes sense. Why the hell you'd want to do this:


...is beyond me, but I work in north Raleigh + it's prevalent up there in the tundra of what people around here call "North Hills." It's really high apparently. Like high on crack! Cos every soccer mom within 3 miles of the area is putting these shitty ass antlers on their car. And I honestly couldn't tell you why. They'd be better off with this:


...but for some unknown reason people find it entertaining to dress their automobiles up like an animal that actually lives in a frozen tundra + goes by another name (they are called caribou). Which reminds me as I was biking home on Raleigh's glorious greenway the other day I was almost gracefully hit by that VW's long lost sister. No. Not an Audi. A deer (remember the VW in the above photo is supposed be a damn caribou).

So if you are thinking of biking on the greenway at night I'd suggest this:


Yep. That! A very small bike with a light on it. Cos this gentleman finds it appropriate to bike through some sort of park with a light on in the middle of the day that is sized for a 4 year old. Had he been me the other day he probably wouldn't be alive today. All that to say that I still slid off my bike + onto my shoulders moments later pedaling down the wet wood boardwalk that runs under Capital Blvd. So if you ride a fixed gear I might suggest this: 


I had one + didn't use it + fell straight off the handle bars. Which speaking of...please don't ride a fixed gear with handle bars like those in the photo above. If you do so please make sure you have some sort of shitty ass antlers on your head. It'll lighten the mood.

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